{"id":2198,"date":"2025-05-11T00:00:48","date_gmt":"2025-05-11T04:00:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/?p=2198"},"modified":"2025-05-11T08:13:23","modified_gmt":"2025-05-11T12:13:23","slug":"blog-where-do-i-belong","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/blog-where-do-i-belong\/","title":{"rendered":"Where do I belong?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; custom_padding_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; admin_label=&#8221;Header&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; background_image=&#8221;https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/view-1.jpg&#8221; parallax=&#8221;on&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;40px|40px||40px|false|true&#8221; custom_margin_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; custom_margin_phone=&#8221;20px|20px||20px|false|true&#8221; custom_margin_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;100px|0px|0px|||&#8221; custom_padding_tablet=&#8221;40px||||false|false&#8221; custom_padding_phone=&#8221;&#8221; border_radii_phone=&#8221;on|20px|20px|20px|20px&#8221; border_radii_last_edited=&#8221;off|desktop&#8221; locked=&#8221;off&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=&#8221;on|tablet&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; background_enable_color=&#8221;off&#8221; background_image=&#8221;https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/view-1-blur.jpg&#8221; parallax=&#8221;on&#8221; transform_scale_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; transform_scale_phone=&#8221;&#8221; transform_scale_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; transform_translate=&#8221;30px|0px&#8221; transform_translate_tablet=&#8221;0px|0px&#8221; transform_translate_phone=&#8221;&#8221; transform_translate_last_edited=&#8221;on|tablet&#8221; transform_translate_linked=&#8221;off&#8221; transform_rotate_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; transform_rotate_phone=&#8221;&#8221; transform_rotate_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; transform_skew_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; transform_skew_phone=&#8221;&#8221; transform_skew_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; transform_origin_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; transform_origin_phone=&#8221;&#8221; transform_origin_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; transform_styles_last_edited=&#8221;on|tablet&#8221; width_tablet=&#8221;90%&#8221; width_phone=&#8221;&#8221; width_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; max_width=&#8221;1200px&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;100px|60px|100px|60px|true|true&#8221; custom_padding_tablet=&#8221;60px||60px||true|true&#8221; custom_padding_phone=&#8221;40px|20px|40px|20px|true|true&#8221; transform_styles_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; transform_styles_phone=&#8221;&#8221; border_radii_phone=&#8221;off|8px|8px||&#8221; border_radii_last_edited=&#8221;off|desktop&#8221; box_shadow_style=&#8221;preset3&#8243; box_shadow_vertical=&#8221;40px&#8221; box_shadow_blur=&#8221;110px&#8221; box_shadow_spread=&#8221;0px&#8221; box_shadow_color=&#8221;rgba(9,6,38,0.62)&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.27.4&#8243; text_font_size=&#8221;17px&#8221; text_line_height=&#8221;1.6em&#8221; header_font=&#8221;Taviraj||||||||&#8221; header_font_size=&#8221;60px&#8221; header_line_height=&#8221;1.2em&#8221; max_width_last_edited=&#8221;off|desktop&#8221; hover_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243; text_font_size_tablet=&#8221;18px&#8221; text_font_size_phone=&#8221;16px&#8221; text_font_size_last_edited=&#8221;on|tablet&#8221; header_font_size_tablet=&#8221;40px&#8221; header_font_size_phone=&#8221;30px&#8221; header_font_size_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; locked=&#8221;off&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221; sticky_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243;]<\/p>\n<h1>Where do I belong?<\/h1>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; admin_label=&#8221;About&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; background_color=&#8221;rgba(0,0,0,0)&#8221; z_index=&#8221;1&#8243; custom_margin=&#8221;|40px||40px|false|true&#8221; custom_margin_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; custom_margin_phone=&#8221;|20px||20px|false|true&#8221; custom_margin_last_edited=&#8221;on|tablet&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;0px||0px||false|false&#8221; hover_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221; sticky_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243;][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; background_color=&#8221;#ffffff&#8221; z_index=&#8221;0&#8243; width_tablet=&#8221;90%&#8221; width_phone=&#8221;90%&#8221; width_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; max_width=&#8221;1200px&#8221; overflow-x=&#8221;visible&#8221; overflow-y=&#8221;visible&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;-30px|auto||auto|false|false&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;60px|60px|60px|51px|true|false&#8221; custom_padding_tablet=&#8221;|||60px|false|false&#8221; custom_padding_phone=&#8221;|20px||20px|false|true&#8221; hover_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243; box_shadow_style=&#8221;preset3&#8243; box_shadow_vertical=&#8221;40px&#8221; box_shadow_blur=&#8221;110px&#8221; box_shadow_spread=&#8221;0px&#8221; box_shadow_color=&#8221;rgba(131,146,167,0.5)&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221; width__hover_enabled=&#8221;off&#8221; sticky_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.27.4&#8243; _module_preset=&#8221;default&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;0px|||3px||&#8221; hover_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221; sticky_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There is a fear of not having a place in the world &#8211; a place and a context. Who am I when I am not \u201chelping\u201d someone else? Is there such a place? A place where I can be without performing, without being a therapist, mother, daughter\u2026etc.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These thoughts came to me this morning after a dream last night. I dreamed that I came to work (in the dream I was at a former workplace that I recognize) and apparently I had decided to quit there and had resigned. Even though I have several weeks left until I am supposed to quit, they have already cleaned out everything that used to be in my workspace and the boss only said; \u201cyou don\u2019t have to come back anymore, it\u2019s best if you just leave\u201d.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I have similar dreams like this one from time to time; where I can\u2019t find my way home, where I am lost. When I want to call for help I don\u2019t remember how to use my cell phone\u2026<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Nowadays I have a strong inner compass that I trust leading me where I need to go. And that doesn&#8217;t mean it&#8217;s the same as leading me where I want to go, it&#8217;s the path I need to take to continue growing and understanding myself.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Right now I am sitting with the rather uncomfortable feeling of not being sure of my place. It feels wide open and vulnerable to write about it with the intention of also sharing it in a new blog post&#8230;and I allow both sadness and fear to wash through me while I lovingly also &#8221;hold myself&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In this moment I am not trying to find solutions, explanations or encouragement, but I notice that judgmental thoughts (about everything I have and should be grateful for) are eager to come to take me away from the uncomfortable feeling of inadequacy.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And suddenly there&#8217;s a shift. The sad and fearful feelings that have come in waves all morning have calmed down and I feel calm and at peace. Accepting all the feelings and experiencing them &#8211; letting them flow through until they ebbed out transformed them into something else.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I now have a sense of gratitude flowing in and I smile inwardly, embracing the wise intelligence within me that just spoke to me through the waves of emotion. Grateful for my trust that once again led me where I needed to go.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And how about the questions I woke up with? \u201cWhere do I belong and who am I \u00a0&#8211; when I\u2019m not helping someone else?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For the moment, I can no longer feel the intensity or the emotional charge of the questions &#8211; which moments ago completely took over. I don&#8217;t even feel I need any answers. \u00a0Instead, I feel calm, silently joyful a and in deep gratitude for trusting life, knowing that I have just taken another small step in understanding myself.<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I am &#8211; it is enough to know right now \u2764\ufe0f<\/p>\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\n<p style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_divider _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; _module_preset=&#8221;default&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][\/et_pb_divider][et_pb_image src=&#8221;https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/IMG_9390-scaled.jpg&#8221; title_text=&#8221;IMG_9390&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.27.4&#8243; _module_preset=&#8221;default&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;||-150px|||&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;||0px|||&#8221; hover_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221; sticky_enabled=&#8221;0&#8243;][\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=&#8221;1&#8243; admin_label=&#8221;Footer&#8221; _builder_version=&#8221;4.5.1&#8243; background_image=&#8221;https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/lotus-1.jpg&#8221; parallax=&#8221;on&#8221; parallax_method=&#8221;off&#8221; overflow-x=&#8221;visible&#8221; overflow-y=&#8221;visible&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;100px|40px|40px|40px|false|true&#8221; custom_margin_tablet=&#8221;0px||||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_phone=&#8221;|20px||20px|false|true&#8221; custom_margin_last_edited=&#8221;on|phone&#8221; global_module=&#8221;310&#8243; locked=&#8221;off&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_row _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; width_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; width_phone=&#8221;90%&#8221; width_last_edited=&#8221;on|phone&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243; _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; background_color=&#8221;rgba(255,255,255,0.3)&#8221; background_enable_image=&#8221;off&#8221; parallax=&#8221;on&#8221; transform_scale_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; transform_scale_phone=&#8221;&#8221; transform_scale_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; transform_translate=&#8221;0px|-160px&#8221; transform_translate_tablet=&#8221;0px|0px&#8221; transform_translate_phone=&#8221;&#8221; transform_translate_last_edited=&#8221;on|phone&#8221; transform_translate_linked=&#8221;off&#8221; transform_rotate_last_edited=&#8221;off|desktop&#8221; transform_skew_last_edited=&#8221;off|desktop&#8221; transform_origin_last_edited=&#8221;off|desktop&#8221; transform_styles_last_edited=&#8221;on|phone&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;150px|50px|50px|50px|false|true&#8221; custom_padding_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; custom_padding_phone=&#8221;20px|20px|20px|20px|true|true&#8221; custom_padding_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; filter_opacity=&#8221;94%&#8221; transform_styles_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; transform_styles_phone=&#8221;&#8221; box_shadow_style=&#8221;preset3&#8243; box_shadow_vertical=&#8221;30px&#8221; box_shadow_blur=&#8221;100px&#8221; box_shadow_spread=&#8221;40px&#8221; box_shadow_color=&#8221;rgba(102,100,126,0.16)&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.23.1&#8243; text_font=&#8221;Taviraj|500|||||||&#8221; text_text_color=&#8221;#000000&#8243; text_line_height=&#8221;2.2em&#8221; header_3_font=&#8221;Taviraj|600|||||||&#8221; header_3_text_color=&#8221;rgba(0,0,0,0.36)&#8221; header_3_font_size=&#8221;18px&#8221; header_3_line_height=&#8221;1.4em&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;||60px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; custom_margin_phone=&#8221;||30px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h3>Call<\/h3>\n<p>+46 735466056<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; text_font=&#8221;Taviraj|600|||||||&#8221; text_text_color=&#8221;#000000&#8243; text_font_size=&#8221;15px&#8221; text_line_height=&#8221;1.8em&#8221; header_3_font=&#8221;Taviraj|600|||||||&#8221; header_3_text_color=&#8221;rgba(0,0,0,0.36)&#8221; header_3_font_size=&#8221;18px&#8221; header_3_line_height=&#8221;1.2em&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;||60px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; custom_margin_phone=&#8221;||30px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h3>Email<\/h3>\n<p><span \n                data-original-string='pPRqHMvtuq2EUEjJJ8zVyA==a53QSnPbK8+g+sjVxhbHUhCaMZG2G1FkVqp1mOnGSd+ug4='\n                class='apbct-email-encoder'\n                title='This contact has been encoded by Anti-Spam by CleanTalk. Click to decode. To finish the decoding make sure that JavaScript is enabled in your browser.'>in<span class=\"apbct-blur\">**<\/span>@<span class=\"apbct-blur\">*************<\/span>om.com<\/span>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.27.0&#8243; text_font=&#8221;Taviraj|600|||||||&#8221; text_text_color=&#8221;#000000&#8243; text_font_size=&#8221;15px&#8221; text_line_height=&#8221;1.8em&#8221; header_3_font=&#8221;Taviraj|600|||||||&#8221; header_3_text_color=&#8221;rgba(0,0,0,0.36)&#8221; header_3_font_size=&#8221;18px&#8221; header_3_line_height=&#8221;1.2em&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;||60px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; custom_margin_phone=&#8221;||30px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h3>Address<\/h3>\n<p>Central Link\u00f6ping, Sweden<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=&#8221;4.16&#8243; text_font=&#8221;Taviraj|600|||||||&#8221; text_text_color=&#8221;#000000&#8243; text_font_size=&#8221;15px&#8221; text_line_height=&#8221;1.8em&#8221; header_3_font=&#8221;Taviraj|600|||||||&#8221; header_3_text_color=&#8221;rgba(0,0,0,0.36)&#8221; header_3_font_size=&#8221;18px&#8221; header_3_line_height=&#8221;1.2em&#8221; custom_margin=&#8221;||60px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_tablet=&#8221;&#8221; custom_margin_phone=&#8221;||30px||false|false&#8221; custom_margin_last_edited=&#8221;on|desktop&#8221; global_colors_info=&#8221;{}&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h3>Hours<\/h3>\n<p>Mon &#8211; Fri: 9am &#8211; 6pm<\/p>\n<p>Weekends: closed<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n<span class=\"et_bloom_bottom_trigger\"><\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Where do I belong?There is a fear of not having a place in the world &#8211; a place and a context. Who am I when I am not \u201chelping\u201d someone else? Is there such a place? A place where I can be without performing, without being a therapist, mother, daughter\u2026etc. These thoughts came to me [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":23,"featured_media":2184,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2198","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-okategoriserad"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2198","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/23"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2198"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2198\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2184"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2198"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2198"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/helenaswanstrom.com\/sv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2198"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}